Friday, September 30, 2011

A Vanity Affair

Don't worry, I am not having an affair with my vanity. Nor with anybody else, for that matter. Definitely not with the gardener. Actually, Brad just came in and told me that we don't have a gardener. We have a homeless guy who comes to the door requesting money for pizza, and who occasionally offers to do yard work in exchange. Brad never gives him money, and doesn't believe he will do yard work because he never brings yard work tools with him. But if you think about it, that makes sense, because he's homeless, so where would he keep his tools? Even so, this explains a lot about the current state of our lawn.

The lawn of our 1920s house, with the original bathroom. The house may very well be our dream home, but for the bathroom. For one thing, it's tiny. The pedestal sink, though not original, is lovely and classic and offers exactly NO storage space (unless you count the gunk we are currently storing in the pipes).  The medicine cabinet is surely as old as the house. The three tiny shelves barely hold daily necessities.  And the mirror on the door? Total joke! It's so old it's cloudy--I kind of like that about it, actually, but it's not so good for applying makeup.

To make matters worse, the cabinet is off center above the sink. So if you were to stand centered in front of the sink (which means you've wedged your right hip between the sink and the radiator that is conveniently placed ten inches away), you'd still have to lean your head several inches to the right in order to see yourself in the blurry mirror.

So I decided I needed a vanity. And yes, I know what you must be thinking: "A vanity? Why does she need a vanity? For makeup? But she never wears any!" And it's true, I don't. But I've got a ton of it.

It's just too much work, standing in front of the mirror, leaning like the Tower of Pisa, putting it on, taking it off. Who has the time? I know where there's a will there's a way. But there's no will. I rarely leave the house these days, so who am I trying to impress?  The gardener?

But now I have this desk, another piece from my mother-in-law's basement that we could have had anyway. In fact, she'd offered it to me several times, but I wasn't interested. It's a nice piece of furniture, yes (made by Sligh, for those who like details). But it's a bit fancy for our house. Except I do think you can get a little fancy in the bedroom.

Now all I need is a mirror and a chair, and maybe next time I run into somebody I know at the store I won't look like a complete sloth. And maybe I'll remember to buy lightbulbs too.


  1. Hahaha, I LOVE that he never has yard tools! That is awesome! He's an Italian lover, you've got to love his specifics of what he'll "use" the money for.

    We too have a very tiny bathroom, all 5 of us share it! Glad you found more storage, and it's pretty!

  2. We always laugh about that too. And Brad always says, "HE wants money for pizza? I want money for pizza!"

    I think it's incredible that you moved to Hawaii. Your house is darling, but I don't know how you do it! Still, it must be nice to be "forced" to simplify. I always mean to get rid of more than I do, but so much of it ends up in the basement.